We are all stereotyped.

If we are close friends , then you are well aware of my weird fetish. I am a die hard fan of jang(luo) men. I mean they are just my talisman.
It hasn’t always been like that . It all started when I was in my third year of high school , some preacher during one of those compulsory Sunday services said that we should be specific with what we want . That we should even attempt to write down in detail all those things we pray for.

As I was writing down my list of dream guy (because doesn’t every 17 year old deserve to dream a little? ) I realised that all the physical attributed put down on that paper could be found easily . See I like rough looking guys with a charming face and an even inviting jawline . I mean , aren’t Jang’s just like the west African men of Kenya ?
That’s how I came to the conclusion that I totally would die for a jang boyfriend and /or husband .
I like their sense of pride , their possessiveness and how sweet and romantic they can get. These men have a strong physical stature and just fantastic shoulders . I am a fan of large hands so they also get points for that . They aren’t perfect , I am yet to meet a jang with cute nails (another weird fetish) but they makeup for that with their good fashion taste.

When I first told my mother about how I really want a jang , she didn’t say anything . I read no emotions from her face. She gave away nothing . I thought she was cool with it .
See we are Kikuyu’s . My family isn’t really a liberal one . Many of my relatives have a traditional mindset in this mordern world . Interdating (is that even a word ) is limited to particular tribes .

Weeks later after this grand revelation , I went to visit my grandmother. I didn’t even last a day before I realised that my beautiful mother had already told her about my idea of an ideal man . After a couple of awkward remarks she finally decide that it was time we have a descent talk .
She sat me down on her dinning table one morning and gave it to me straight . There was all the grown woman talk , the focus on your university education first then when you are done with school just make sure not to be married from this particular tribes . She mention four tribes , luo being one of them .
I tried to tell her that all those reasons she gave me behind why I shouldn’t be married off to any of those tribes were just stereotypes . She didn’t care to listen . The conversation ended with her saying “Dikweda thakame njuru nyuba yakwa” which means “I do not want bad blood in my family” .

I am also stereotyped , I mean, aren’t we all ? The other day we were talking with my girl friend about how we wouldn’t want Kikuyu men because they are selfish with their money and unromantic . But isn’t all of that just generalisation.

I hope that by the time I am ready for marriage (might be never )  or atleast in the few years to come , the whole world will have changed its perception of people depending on their tribe , color or race .

Lets do this a person at a time. Lets pick people because of their mindset , their dreams and ambitions . Lets associate with people not because of their race or social class or even tribe , but because their priorities and ideas are in sync with ours. 
I long for a day people will not pick people because of their class or tribe or race or colour .
It’s limiting and corrupted to love someone because of something they didn’t choose to be .
I hope we pick people because of who they are and not who the world wants them to be !

lovely week ahead loves p.s poetry post will be up on Wednesday 

dear family , please dont tell grandmom I wrote  this